Unpacking Love, Faith, and Intimacy for Black Gay Men
Celebrating Juneteenth with a conversation about moving forward as Black queer people
Sometimes, our head tells us to move on long before our heart allows it.
The last relationship I was in had its hooks in me deep and wouldn’t let go. It was definitively the ups-and-downs along my journey to…somewhere…I wouldn’t call it happiness. But I couldn’t let that man go.
He made me feel—good, bad or otherwise, my heart was on, my feelings were engaged and the relationship brought me alive. Perhaps that’s what I was addicted to: the alive feeling.
So much of our lives as Black Gay men is spent numb for safety of ourselves and others. If we actually felt on the same level of our offenses, we’d all have license to burn this thing to the ground. For expediency and quiet, we mask our feelings. But until we can call a thing a thing, it’s hard for us to resolve.
I couldn’t get out of and over that relationship until I could give language to what kept me there in the first place. I had to work through my feelings with intention. Then, resolve was easy. But how do we create resolve in our lives, lest we do the work of giving our problems language?
DEAR BLACK GAY MEN IN THE MORNING | TUES. & THURS. LIVE AT 11PM EASTERN
That’s what Dear Black Gay Men is committed to figuring out this week. I sat down with Benjamin Coy to ask if a relationship deserves a second chance after a break up. He’s a cultural influencer with his finger on the pulse of the gworls. He decided to enlighten us for a special episode of Dear Black Gay Men In the Morning.
Thursday, we had an eye opening conversation about mending the relationship Black queer culture has with the Black church. Prominent faith leader, Diamond Washington, and party promoter and adult content creator, MrSinsored hashed through the issues we all face in resolving our own church hurt. Do we need faith institutions as Black queer folks? And if we do, how do demand the Black church see and respect us fully?
DEAR BLACK GAY MEN PODCAST | LIVE THURS. 8PM EASTERN
Our newest podcast, Gooner’s Anonymous, gives Black men language on figuring out our sex lives beyond, but including, penetration. Co-hosted by our resident sex expert,
, I’m learning that there is a deeper level of pleasure that doesn’t always end up with me inside another a man.
Then the podcast is helping us find resolution in our commitments. What are we committing to and how are those emotional ties between us and our partners contributing to our journey toward happiness?
It’s crazy to think that resolve can take so many different forms and hit us on so many different levels. Every time I think I’ve got this life thing sorted, it gives me new opportunity to resolve, go deeper, and live more free.
Enjoy
JTG